Tuesday, September 27, 2011

ACCO - Please rectify my Satanic Swingline Stapler!

After drawing a mean face on my stapler at work, I composed the following letter:
Several days later, I received the following reply, with one of my favorite subject lines: 



Finally, some respect for my problem


For those of you who don't routinely peruse stapler websites, the ACCO site is one of the better ones. They have a whole section devoted to the history of the stapler, along with random tips and tricks, which cover everything from stapling facts to writing tips to energy saving tactics. For example, did you know "nearly one in four (24 percent) female office workers wish they could staple their love handles away, compared to just 12 percent of men?" Didn't think so. But I digress:



A few weeks later, I received a brand new Satan-free stapler: 


No jams yet; but that might be because they didn't send me any staples. Apparently those weren't covered by the warranty. I decided to express my thanks to Kaye:


Perhaps out of jealousy, my other stapler has disappeared. Hopefully JamFree will perform better than his predecessor. 

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